You are a part of an active universe, surrounded by enumerable influences. What shape your character takes, what decisions you make are molded by the thought osmosis with the cosmos. Every person, place or thing carries the capability of persuading you, some consciously while others subliminally. The degree of influence depends on your perceptivity, exposure to influencing factor and the intention of the influence, in case of humans. It is understood that all cosmic components, other than humans, have inspirational intentions.
Humans are divided into two groups, while one category intends to push you forward, the other pulls you back. Although both might think the best for you but the ones who pull you back don’t even realize that they are acting as resistance on your journeys.
You yourself belong to one such category. If you are mindful of your interactions, you would know which one. You either empower others or criticize them, either offer hope or trigger hopelessness,either liberate or agitate, either spread smiles or frowns. In short, you either help people find their best or bring them down to their worst.
Although you might get an evanescent elation by punching someones ego and puncturing their confidence. Yet, in the long run, you will find it is always better to embellish someone with good words than degrade them. It helps you make a friend, gives you an enduring warm feeling which degrading does not and it activates your perception to see the good in all situations.
Criticism pulls, constructive criticism pushes
Criticism is an accomplice to discouragement, when someone criticizes you even when you give it your all, you get demotivated, and instead of expanding yourself to try harder, you give up. A genuine person would never pull you back with baseless criticism but will make you push harder the next time by making you believe that you can do much better.
Baseless criticism hints at a malign intention, where the only end product is that the recipient looks down upon himself, whereas constructive criticism exemplifies care, where you actually want the person to do better. The former is preferred over the latter because it is easier to find problems than look for solutions, especially in someone else’s case.
Learn to walk in someone else’s shoes
It is impossible for you to understand what you make someone else go through, unless you walk a while in their shoes. Your words impact others more than what you think they do, so choose them carefully. You might not have bad intentions yet why take the risk of demoralizing someone to the extent of depression. Life is too grueling a test in itself for people to feel down and out, give someone a chance to be inspired than condemning them further.
No one was born absolute, everyone possesses anomalies. Recollect how you feel when someone admonishes you for your weaknesses. Keep this feeling in mind when you are about to do the same to others. How do you feel when someone notices something special about you and makes the extra effort of complimenting you. Remember this when you notice something good about someone and are too afraid to verbalize it.
Push them beyond their dreams
I have always noticed people who know what is not be done and how life is not to be lived but are clueless about the right way. Pessimism might empower you to see the worst in every situation for yourself, but this doesn’t give you the right to pull back and complain about others who dare to walk the paths you are too afraid to take.
You might mean well for someone but you cant criticize or complain about their choices, you are better off cheering them on and offering advice if required. This way you will have the ultimate satisfaction of being a small part of someone else’s success rather an a mere impediment in their journey towards it.
Take time from your schedule and notice your interactions to understand which category you belong to, you might push some and pull others. Remember, the work of a critic is easy whereas the responsibility of being a motivator is arduous.But the joy you get pushing someone beyond their own threshold is unparalleled.